Well, we made it.

Well, we made it through another year. To be honest I wasn't always so sure it was going to happen.

What have I learned the last year? Well, I don't really remember right now. I was hoping to learn more but there was so much good television on. To celebrate new years I watched Mystery Men.

This movie came out ten years ago. The same year I began a mission for the LDS Church. My district watched it. I was told we had permission but I think that was a lie. On New Years in 1999 most missionaries in Cary, North Carolina had fallen asleep by 10:00 or so, but I stayed up. I remember walking out on our back porch listening to people celebrating and drinking as 12:00 came and went. I have never, in my life, felt more alone than at that moment.

Then a line from the movie came to me as if by inspiration. In the movie the Shoveller says "Lucille, God gave me a gift. I shovel well. I shovel very well." My super power is cleaning. I clean well, I clean really well. I instantly felt better. Oh, I still felt alone, but the pure absurdity of existence and the series of events that had brought me to where I was, struck me as bizarre. I was glade to have made it through that year, and felt hope for the future. "After all", I thought to myself, "things surely can't get worse than they are now."

Of course I was wrong, but it was a nice moment, even if it was only a moment.

Anyways, enough of that nonsense. Here are my prediction for 2010!

1. Once again, no flying cars. I don't know what the "scientist" are doing with there time.
2. Shark attacks will be down.
3. Bear attacks will be up.
4. Killer Bees and global warming will lead to a new threat... fire breathing killer bees that will spread fear into the hearts of men.
5. Twilight will continue to annoy the crap out of me throughout the year.
6. My family and extended family will continue to be totally awesome.
7. Leg warmers will make a come back. Bell Bottoms will not.
8. Walmart will turn out to be the "Great and Abdominal" Church, spoken of in the Book of Mormon.
9. I will forget where I parked my car at least 23 times.
10. I will convince myself, once again, that raising my own chickens is a good idea.

Bring it 2010. If your dare, and 2009 don't let the door hit you on A$% on your way out.